I wish it was raining.

That's the only way you'll get me outside. Until tomorrow, anyway. I have to go back to school. I have to, I have to, I have to. I have to practice. I have to go April 17th. I have to make it. I have to, I have to, I have to.

Four days. Four days and I've hardly spoke more than, what? 10 words? Almost. Well, maybe a few more than that, but I've been pretty quiet these days. Too quiet, to say the least. I've just felt miserable and dead. Completely dead and my spirits need to be lightened up. And there's actually not a lot of people I can depend on to do so. Maybe 2 or 3 at the most. That's bad. I won't tell you who they are, but...

I lost my train of thought. It went into the dark tunnel of no return.

Man, my mom's laugh is annoying. Nay, irritating. She's just irritating. I don't like being around my parents that much anymore. They just make me itchy. You know that you can't talk to your parents about the things you talk about with your friends, right? I dunno, maybe it's not that. I'm just down. I'm so down that I'm negatively up.